A Report Of A Rather Exciting and Altogether Invigorating Meeting Between The General Manager And The Master Of The Ring Known By The Name Of Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing

The secretary had stepped out for a minute by the time the throng of journalists arrived at the office of the General Manager.


Cameras rolled and pictures taken as reporters excitedly awaited the next move of the seething superstar of the squared circle. The man known only as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.


Silently, they watched as he stares at the empty secretary's desk. He clenches his fists as he gestures to where the secretary should be seated.


Q: "Do you see this! It is an empty chair! Even in this dire moment of my anger and misery, they cannot even afford a low level employee for me to shout unfriendly accusations and insults at! How can they expect me to properly convey my grievances to that albino worm of a smurf, if I am unable to rehearse my raging hard soliloquy with his secretary!"


The masked man does not wait for any of the reporters to answer his question. Instead, he opens the door to Pinky's office, who happens to be in.


Q: "I would like to speak with you, you pale, big nosed excuse of a sodomite! I would like an explanation on this latest example of the NPW throwing spit on my person!"


His countryman quickly opens his laptop, showing a screenshot of the offending match graphic.





Q: "I demand to know what is the meaning of this attempt to even credit me as a big, blond Samoan! It was bad enough that I cannot even have my own name featured! Now you attempt to besmirch me as Samoan Ron Jeremy!"


Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing does not even wait for the General Manager to respond.


Q: "I have wrestled all over the world in many promotions big and small! I have never received the treatment I have gotten here in the NPW! And you still expect me to be your friend on Facebook! I think I would rather turn you into a small, red stain!"


Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing takes a step towards Pinky, only to be held back by his countrymen, urging him to calm down.

The masked marvel who has thrilled his way into the hearts of millions of fans around the world stares at the peace offering from the little smurf. He then stares pointedly at the albino creature.


He begins to speak. The seethingly steamed sensation of the squared circled, known as Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.


Q: "You do not even have a budget for an alphabet! Now you try to give me this! Look at all these holes! You could only afford the cheese which has been soiled and fornicated upon by your fellow kind! Look at how many holes this has! How many times have you and your fellow creepy smurfs been humping this wad!"


Several of the reporters stare at Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing.


Reporter: "That's...Swiss cheese..."


Q: "So it means Swiss smurfs did this! You wish to give me cheese that has been triple-penetrated and soiled upon by the Ron Jeremies of your kind! You must think I will calm down at the sight of any yellow wad you offer up to me!"


The reporters who are his countrymen try to calm down the aggrieved talisman of their beloved homeland, even as his frustration and Narf Poit's lack of competency is televised around the world. However, they too cannot help but empathize with the seething boil that threatens to bubble out of the colorfully costumed crusader of the four-cornered ring.


Reporter 2: "General Manager Pinky. I think it is fair to ask what steps you will take to make sure this does not happen again? Will the staff responsible for this insult be punished?"


Q: "You cannot even afford consonants and vowels! How are you even going to punish the staff who make these grievous insults! Are you going to withold their pay! Do you even pay them!"


Reporter 3: [Maybe they get free handjobs?]


Reporter 2: [If that's the case this Pinky fella is ripping them off!]


Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing gives his countrymen a weird look, before he refocuses his ire on the General Manager.


Q: "I tire of the slip-ups that keep happening to me here! I am either getting pay packets filled with wads of dust! Or I am given cheese which has been wadded on by your creepy fellow smurfs! I want to be duly compensated for actions done to me, and I do not mean I want to get pay packets which have been wadded on by smurfs!"

OOC: [OMG!!! BEST RP EVAR!!! AS IN EVAR!!!]

The in-disguise icon of the squared circle listens to Pinky's proposal, even as his countrymen try to calm him down. This masked man named Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing is suspicious of the idea given to him.


Q: "That sounds like something I can accept! But I have received my share of stinky wads, and you will have to understand that I am not so trusting of this!"


His countrymen try to intercede.


Reporter: "Then it's a good idea that we've got all these news cameras recording this negotiation! If you accept, then the NPW would have to make sure you get paid."


Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing tlts his head slightly at his countrymen.


Q: "Yes! I see your point! If this albino smurf is offering this, I think I will accept it! But I want more details on how much of the ticket sales I will be getting before I agree to anything!"


Pinky's reply is drowned out by the unexpected, aneurysm-causing cry echoing through the dinky halls of the NPW building.


Reporter: "What is that!"


Q: "It sounds like a cry of pleasure! Or the cry of someone having his very essence, identity and genitalia chewed and eaten away by mangy sewer rodents!"


Reporter 2: "How...how would you know that?"


Quioaecaopedidwazhapzhing gives her a straight answer.


Q: "It is the same cry I heard from the Hung Man after I beat him in a Last Man Standing Ballet In A Sewer Match! I only had enough time to get out before the rats ate him! Down there! Between the legs! It was a horrible, soul-searing cry that cannot be truly forgotten, no matter how hard I try!"


Reporter: "It was a popular ringtone in our homeland for a time."


Q: "That too! But back to the proposal before me! I can accept your terms, smurf! But I will need more specifics!"